Dealing With
Confrontation in Cheating - How to Approach a Cheating Spouse
Never confront your cheating wife or partner without solid
evidence of cheating - without solid evidence, your cheating spouse is
going to react by:
-
Total denial -- simply refusing to accept
your accusations or allegations of having being cheating on you;
-
He / she will act outraged at you for having
suggested such a thing ;
-
He / she may in turn accuse you of
cheating , lying or even stealing;
-
Your cheating wife or husband will start
acting like a victim of wrongful accusations or even marital
violence -- may start crying or acting angry trying to become manipulative
of your emotions;
-
He/she will accuse you of being
suspicious, jealous, spying on them, making them feel like someone is
watching them or stalking them all the time, making them feel miserable or
vulnerable;
-
He / she will accuse you of bringing discord
into the relationship by creating lack of trust;
-
And now since you have already warned
them of your suspicions about cheating, your wife, husband or
partner is going to move fast to destroy the cheating evidence and cover
up their tracks. So it will be hard to prove.
What's more, your premature confrontation
will not stop the cheating behavior -- if anything, it will make them more
careful to not leave any clues behind. And your husband/ wife will start
finding fault with you or wrongfully picking on you or taunting you at
even the slightest issue. Your cheating wife or husband or partner will
start making your life miserable through emotional or psychological
abusive manipulations.
How to Confront a Cheating Spouse -- At this stage, if you really feel you
need to talk to your spouse about his / her cheating on you, here is
how to approach it:
At the end of the day when both of you
are relaxing or having a light conversation in the privacy of
your own home, and when your partner least expects it, totally
casually say something like (make sure to use your own friend's/
co-worker's particulars -- be sure that your husband/wife does not
know this person well):
"Hey, do you know Jake - at my work - his
girlfriend is cheating on him. Poor guy he is devastated. He was asking me
for advice on how to handle her cheating behavior. What do you think I
should tell him?"
Then watch your partner's reaction closely.
If he/she is innocent -- he /she will want
to talk more about this fictitious cheating story about 'Jake' --
may ask questions -- want to know more-- and may even give some honest
advise about how 'Jake' can deal with cheating. With questions like: "Oh
really, how does he know for sure she is cheating."
On the other hand, if your wife/husband or
lover is guilty of being a cheat ;
-
His/her heart is going to 'miss a
beat' at the mere mention of the word 'cheating'... this will show up as a
'drop in facial expression or paling of the face'... You are going to
notice it.
-
And it may be followed by: "Honey, Why
do we need to get involved in other people's lives" -- There may be a
total reluctance to discuss the issue of cheating any further,
-
He / she may avoid eye contact with
you or look away quickly --
-
Or your husband or wife might get
angry or excited and he / she may become frigid and avoid any further
intimacy with you at that time.
But what if your husband , wife or partner
are good at hiding their emotions -- they are able to maintain a 'straight
face' or appear 'unruffled' in all kinds of situations -- in this case,
you will simply be raising a red flag in his/her mind that you know that
he /she is cheating on you. -- this may make them more careful in the
future -- and make it difficult for you to catch him or her.
So it's best to find the cheating evidence
first.
For More information about how to confront a cheating spouse read the
article: How to Deal With Cheating
How to Deal With
Confrontation in a Cheating Relationship - Recommended Self Help Tools
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