How to Break Up With Someone and Survive
You may have been going out with someone for a while, may have been together for
a short period of time... when you realize that the relationship is simply not
going the way you want to go... your ways are different, even though you realize
that your girlfriend or boyfriend is a good man or woman.
This is the breakup that is initiated with the "it is not you... it is me..."
approach.
Such a breakup should not create much of an emotional dent for you. Though
there may be sadness at the parting, yet you may experience more of a relief of
getting out of it and on with your life.
Yet the story with your partner may be different depending on how he /she was
viewing the relationship. You may be hurting your partner badly. In fact he/she
may be getting angry or all emotional over the parting. But you have to remain
strong... Don't give in to the emotional outburst. You have got your own
life to live.
And it is the best thing for both of you in the long run. It would have broken
up anyways when your paths started diverging greatly. So better sooner than
later.
The faster you get through with it, the faster both of you will be able to
recover and move on.
The fear of facing your partner's tears or emotionalism should not deter you
from delaying the break up any further than necessary. It is a difficult task,
yet it has to be tackled. So go ahead and do it. Though don't give in to
the tears. You may project an image of being 'cold hearted', yet it is for
the best.
He /she will be able to get over it soon and move on.
So keep the 'break-up meeting' short, preferably in a public place, don't try to
get defensive or into an argument, just explain the basics. Don't make any
promises to meet again. Let your partner know in no uncertain terms that you are
making a clean break and don't want to be contacted again. Say good bye and
leave. If you fear that a face to face breakup meeting could turn potentially
bad or explosive, well then use a break up note or letter to convey the message
or leave a message on his/her answering machine.
Although you may carry an 'after taste' for a short while immediately after the
break up, however getting over it should not be much of a hurdle because you
have already made up your mind to do so. Though for goodness sake, please don't
head over to your best friend's digs for a 'cry-party' over this breakup. Crying
will simply release a torrent of unwanted emotions and make you feel miserable
for a long time. You want to get over it as soon as possible.
To 'survive' and sail through the first few days afterwards, it would be a
good idea to indulge yourself in some positive ways...
-
Go watch some good movie - make it inspiring,
humor or motivational - no sad movies please (Also do this alone).
-
Pamper yourself with a spa treatment or massage.
-
Get a new hair cut or style.
-
Go all the way and spoil yourself with some
Positive
re-inforcement.
You will find yourself a totally new person and
over the breakup in no time at all.
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